Sunday 14 March 2010

On honest campaigning and muesli

I don't, to my knowledge, suffer from dementia nor any other such debilitating condition that might seriously affect my judgement.

It came as a bit of a shock therefore to have discovered this evening that over the past few days I have been eating with cold milk several large helpings of "muesli", complaining quietly to myself about the quality of the product that Caroline had purchased from Tesco, only to realise tonight upon reading the wording on the near-empty packet that it was actually porridge. I promise I am not making this up.

In the absence of any serious medical ailment to explain away my error I can only put it down to the stresses of everyday life. Those stresses will be the same as those that affect most ordinary people - parenthood, making an income - with the added pressure of having to help to organise a local election campaign. Despite the fact that this time around we have a much stronger team than ever before including some extremely talented and dedicated individuals, many of whom now have four years more experience than they did last time we ventured forth, the hosepipe principle in which the more people we have available to do the work the more work there is to do would appear to apply.

Over the past week or so it would appear that some of our opponents have joined the battle. We always knew they would and we are resigned to having them around for a few weeks until polling day arrives, whereupon they will in all likelihood return whence they came into hibernation for another three years and ten months until the next round of hustings arrives.

In Hounslow South New Labour has been distributing a glossy leaflet announcing the candidacy (in so many words) of veteran party activist and former council leader Dave Wetzel, alongside local stalwart Bob Whatley and a young lady with whom the ICG is not familiar. In Isleworth, residents of a small section of the Worton estate have had to make do with a rather grotty card introducing residents to Sue "Pyro" Sampson, Ed Mayne of Chiswick (who surprised the Poppy Organiser from the Isleworth Royal British Legion when ordering a wreath at last year's Remembrance Day Parade by informing him that he was an Isleworth councillor when, being my own father, said Poppy Organiser knew full well he wasn't), and another new face. The previous week Sue had been out and about on the periphery of the Worple estate delivering her message, whatever that may be.

The promises made by New Labour in both glossy and grotty cannot be accused of lacking ambition. Apparently they are going to put 100 new uniformed police officers onto the streets of Hounslow (which is even more impressive when one considers that employing police officers is not even within the remit of the local authority) and cut Council Tax!

In reality of course this is just another example of the dishonesty for which New Labour in Hounslow have become renowned, and of the contempt in which they hold "ordinary" voters and the lack of respect that they have for their intelligence, which in turn explains their almost obsessive aversion to allowing "ordinary" people to participate in the running of residents' associations and community groups.

It also demonstrates their preparedness even at this early stage to renege immediately upon their promises if they were to be elected, bearing in mind that this particular pledge is one that they will know full well cannot be delivered.

During their previous local election campaign, in 2006, they had claimed in their leaflets to have put an end to the Mogden Pong and to have made the 267s the run on time.

Maybe it is the knowledge that I am resigned to having to spend almost the next two months of my life engaged in a battle of sorts with such dishonest, low-grade individuals to ensure that residents are equipped with the information they need to see through them that has brought about such stress as to render me temporarily incapable of differentiating between muesli and porridge?

But New Labour would consider the above paragraph to be a compliment in every aspect, so if it's all the same to readers of this blog I am going to put it down to old age.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Twelve Labour canvassers, with no hope of heaven
Five mention Mrs Keen
Then there are seven

Seven Labour canvassers, about to take a dive
Two visit Ivybridge
Then there are five

Five Labour canvassers, anxious as can be
Two apply their ethics
Then there are three

Three Labour canvassers, abused and on the run
Two go back to Southall
Then there's only one

One Labour canvasser, confidence drained away
Comes across so poorly
His party lose the day



* Loosely based on an infamous poem supposedly written anonymously in 1888, but authenticity now considered dubious

Brentford pied-a-terre said...

Indeed, the pressures of modern life can play cruel tricks with our feeble, fragile minds.
Recently I found myself eating a brillo pad while Mrs Brentford pied-a-terre was trying to clean the oven with a shredded wheat.
An easy mistake to make and even easier to blame the missus.

Unknown said...

Please grow up and stop spreading silly lies about me. I attended the Day of Remembrance in Isleworth last year having been asked to on behalf of the Labour Party. I have never 'posed as a councillor' - to paraphrase your ludicrous allegation.

Phil Andrews said...

That was the story I was told Ed, and I think I've known my own father long enough to know when he is telling me the truth.

Happy to publish your rebuttal however in the interests of fairness.

I have no desire to spread lies about you, although as you will be part of the notorious New Labour team here in Isleworth for the next few weeks you will certainly be expected to spread a few of your own.

Will see you around during the campaign - may the best men (or women) win.

Geezer said...

So then Mr Honest Ed of London W4, tell us all about these 100 police officers that you are going to put on the streets of Hounslow when you are elected to represent the good people of Isleworth?

(that last bit was meant to be ironic incidentally!)

Isleworth's Fifth Councillor said...

Loosen up Phil, I've been enjoying free lunches on your manor for the last two years.

Phil Andrews said...

Explain, 5c.